Little Sister Turns 30!

So my little sister, Corinne, turns 30 today. To help her see the true significance of the day’s event, I’ve created a “10 Things to Expect Now That Your 30” list.

1. No longer will people/family refer to you as “kid” or say things like “she’s an up-and-comer” or “when she finds her path.” You’ve now reached the threshold of adulthood and that crap is saved for the twenty-something crowd. You’re an old married lady now. It is what it is…and now you’re old just like me.
2. On the upside to this, you now no longer have to worry about being hit on by guys who are not even legal to buy beer. You will now be revered as the old lady at the parties of your old hangout buddies. But take heart, with age comes wisdom.
3. You will now (or will soon learn) the significance of underwires in bras.
4. 401K – these four little characters now have serious significance as every day brings you closer to reaching that fun little nursing home era.
5. Hangovers – now take a good 2 days to recover from. Gone are the days of 2 Advil and a Gatorade to make you feel new again.
6. No longer will the contents of your purse look like it’s packed for a night on the town (smokes, cash, keyes, make-up). Now, you’ll be more prone to carry tissues, binkies, extra wipes, coupons, and Pepcid for those rare occasions that you can go out and eat hotwings.
7. You are now only 10 years away from your first mammogram. Excited yet?
8. You are now old enough to appreciate that the toys we played with as little girls are considered retro and are back in style. Wish I still had my original Care Bear – that sucker would be worth some money.
9. After today, you are closer to 40 than you are 20. Isn’t that a peach!
10. And finally, I felt that my 20’s were spent trying to figure out who I was to become and my 30’s have been much more enjoyable just being happy with who I am. I hope that you too will find that same peace that comes with knowing that you’re a good, stong beautiful woman. Hopefully your 30’s will be a good decade for you.

I’m so glad that we’ve been able to stay close because it certainly wasn’t all roses growing up. We fought terribly through our teen years and I even used to play the most horrible, mean games with her when we were little. I would tickle her to get her laughing, and then tell her to whistle or I’d punch her as hard as I could. Have you ever tried to whistle when laughing? It’s impossible. WHAM! I’d haul off and deliver the biggest Charlie horse in the leg and scream again, “WHISTLE!” It would go on and on with her screaming, laughing and almost crying…still trying to whistle. Ah…good times. Who would have thought that we’d grow up to be such good friends? Well happy birthday little sister. I love you.

NOW WHISTLE!!